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5 Types of People You Should Avoid To Be Happy

// Photo by Naima Green

If you haven’t read the second part of this series, here it is:  5 Types of People You Should Totally Hang Out With To Be Happy.

If you’re able to comprehend this sentence, I’m sure you have lived long enough to figure out the kinds of people you dislike. While I strongly believe one should be friends with everyone, there should be a line between acknowledging their existence and giving them an all-access pass into your life.

Since we’re all humans, let’s start with the negatives – the types of people you should avoid at all costs. These unreliable people aren’t worth your precious time, and they can make you feel restricted the longer you keep them around your side. Filter them out of your life as soon as possible – you’d be able to express yourself more freely and feel more liberated in the decisions you make.

While it’s still important to be nice to those people, never do it at the expense of your happiness and self-respect.

1. Mr/Mrs. Negative

It is never a good idea to hang around people who are experts in being pessimistic. Moods are contagious, and a very good example would be how your music, or even Instagram filters, affect your perception on certain things. A sad break-up song will dampen and darken your mood a little, and likewise, the Sutro effect on Selfies and Foods will kinda make you portray the picture with a heavier feel.

Being around negative people will eventually lead to you being pessimistic about the things around you as well, trust me. Before you even get started on a project, they will start developing thoughts that the assignment will fail no matter what, and these thoughts are usually aired out pretty often, and loudly, and not necessarily expressed only during the above scenario.

How are you able to keep your morale and positive outlook alive when there’s someone beside you constantly yapping about how life sucks, about how everything sucks and refusing to do anything about it, because, well, “it’s not going to work”.

I’m telling you, even that Pharell Williams song isn’t going to cure them anytime soon.

There’s a difference, however, between being negative, having alot of self-doubt and being disheartened. The second and third are those who suffer from a temporary lack of self confidence or a lack of success, and they may inadvertently voice out what’s on their minds once in awhile. The first, meanwhile, are the ones who hang out their negativity diapers to dry 24/7/365. They’re buzzkills, morale annihilators, mood destructors, vibe obliterators etc, you get the point. The line between them tho are, more often than not, clearly distinct.

In short, just stay as far as you can from negative people. In order to clap along if you feel like happiness is the truth, surround yourself with happy people who thinks positive for most parts of their days, or lives for that matter.

Just like Instagram, filter them out because you don’t need them in your life.

2. Simon Cowell

Come on, life isn’t a reality competition. Why is there a need to judge? No one’s going to Hollywood.

The Simon Cowells are the people that judges others compulsively. They are absolutely toxic, really. They may argue that “oh, you can’t take a joke” or “it’s not my fault that you’re insecure about yourself”, and while that may be true, why do you have to be around with people who makes you feel like shit?

They have absolutely nothing nice to say, and will always hurt and make you feel uneasy around them. Don’t mentally exhaust yourself and starve yourself of feeling-good-about-yourself time because over time, you’re just going to get more and more self-conscious about how you look and behave that you don’t feel like yourself anymore.

There’s no need to continuously subject yourself to being told that “if your lifeguard duties were as good as your singing, a lot of people would be drowning”, or “if you had lived 2,000 years ago and sung like that, I think they would have stoned you”, or “do you have a singing teacher? Get a lawyer and sue her”.

Just give them four no-s to send them out of the reality singing competition called “Your Life”.

Oh and on a side note, do something because you genuinely want to, not because to impress some stuck-up people who will still be talking about you no matter how you change.

For me personally, if people are going to talk about me and the choices I make regardless of how I portray myself, I must as well give them something to talk about.

3. Mine, mine, your tampon, also mine.

Mine-gulls

Yeaaaaa, these type of people kinda probably do not maybe want your tampons per se.

At least that’s what I think.

Anyway, this group of people are always taking and taking and taking and offering nothing to their friends. Just like in love, friendship is also a two-way street, and if you’re constantly offering and doing them favors, helping them with their “enormous workload” (I don’t know, but I think it must be really exhausting just enjoying four whole seasons of Game of Thrones), and cleaning up their mess without getting so much so as a thank-you, or at least some form of reasonable recognition, then chances are you’re probably just a pawn being taken advantage of.

To be honest, I don’t see much difference between love and friendship. If you minus the kissing, chemistry, holding of hands, mutual attraction, public display of attraction, interco- yea you know what, let’s just leave the matter as it is.

Friends, like lovers, should be there when both parties need each other. Even though problems can’t be solved instantly, a listening ear will suffice for most of us to get that heaping load of trashy burden off our chests. If your so-called ‘friend’ can’t do that for you, well, yea.

Even a television theme song knows the definition of a friend.

4. Ego McFlurry

Hah, these are the narcissistic people.

It’s pretty easy to confuse confidence with pathological narcissism due to the judgements and biases registered in your brain, but the overly narcissistic ones are really easy to spot.

They’re full of themselves, have a severe lack of empathy and think they can do whatever they want because “swag”. On planet Earth we have a word for that.

It’s called “Justin Bieber”.

Anyway, what is poisonous about them is basically their lack of empathy, and their willingness to exploit others to further their interests, which is something you don’t see every often in people who have way lower, and healtheir, self-esteem. Without a sense of empathy, you’re just a tool for them to use till they get what they want. After that, they’ll just throw you away like cash in Jersey Shore.

They are ruthless and rarely spare a thought for others, so chances are that you’re going to get eaten up if you hang around them for an extended period of time. Their world only revolves around one person and one person only, themselves, so for them to see you as part of their lives all of a sudden, something’s fishy.

5. People who have not seen Frozen

Frozen is a little overexposed at this stage in time, but the Oscar-winning song Let It Go has ironically evaded the attention of a number of people.

These people are the ones who hold eternal grudges. They’re grumpy mad when they see you, sarcastic when they talk to you, and the waywardness level of their logic is spectacularly phenomenal.

Come on, no one likes North Korea.

Holding grudges is really tiring, for those who experienced how it felt like before. For me personally, I really can’t stay mad at a person for really long. Lucky for the world, most of us are like that.

However, there are still a small group of people in our population that will remain mad at you and refuse to forgive you for something that’s smaller than their brains. If they don’t want to let an ancient squabble go, so be it. We don’t need unforgiving people in our lives.

As humans, we’re going to continue making numerous mistakes, and one of the most important element that allows us to improve from those unfortunate experiences is a supportive group of people that are less self-centered and are willing to give others a chance to make things right.

True friends wouldn’t compromise the friendship between you and them over trivial matters. If you lose them, there’s really nothing to fret about. It’s their loss that they have to shoulder such a heavy burden for the next couple of decades, and should you have done everything humanly possible to make it up to them, don’t let it affect you too much.

And by humanly possible, I meant showing them the movie Frozen.


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37 Comments

  1. I like you already. It’s as if you read my mind and wrote it all before I even had time to jot it down. Get out of my head! I love your straightforwardness and simplicity. You have a knack for writing as if you were just shooting the breeze with your reader. Love it. I’ll definitely be looking forward to your posts. Also, I had actually come across your blog because I did a search on “series” and “installments” because I wanted to write one, but wasn’t sure how to communicate that to the reader, seeing that i’m a blogging newbie. Did you make this notation to the reader when you first wrote it that others would be coming? Did you provide a calendar? Any insight would be great.

    • Hey! I’m sorry I missed out on replying your comment. Hmm for me personally, I don’t really have a schedule (even tho it’s recommended) because I simply do not have the time, and I rather not dish out ‘false promises’. I find that not informing readers offers more unpredictability, but then again, if you tell others what you’re going to be writing, it allows anticipation on their part and they’ll stay tune to what you have planned up for them. Thank you for your kind words btw, it makes my day reading comments like this.

      • No worries at all. Actually, I started a series called Better Pissed Off Than Pissed On. I agree with not sticking to a schedule since I don’t want to stress myself out over something that should be carefree. Writing and blogging is my love and I dont want it to turn into a four letter word: WORK. I send out a new installment when I’ve accumulated enough to dish out. Hope that works for my readers. It’ll do for now.

  2. Interesting and well-written article! I definitely know how awful it feels to be friends with such people, but most of them need a lot of help. Most of these people have been emotionally scarred at some point and they’ve been conditioned to act the way they do. Now don’t get me wrong, we should’t condone their wrongful actions or encourage them to make destructive decisions because that wouldn’t end well for anyone.

    As cheesy as it sounds, sometimes being a good friend to these people when the whole world turns away could improve their situation. It may be a one-sided relationship (like you mentioned above) at first, but as time goes on, they’ll probably be influenced by the unconditional ‘love’ and care you show them, regardless of how many times they let you down. Who knows, maybe they’ll continue to spread love that’s not subjected to any conditions.

    Let’s not be too naive though. The above method may work for most people, but let’s not forget the people who are too strong-headed to change their ways. As for these people, we should still treat them well and shower them with unconditional ‘love’, but keep in mind that they may not see our genuine efforts. Most importantly, we shouldn’t gossip about these people or belittle them online or offline.

    Also while I have to admit that your Justin Bieber joke was pretty funny, he’s a kid who needs lots of help instead of criticism. I used to be a Belieber (you know, when he was sweet, cute and all) but I soon stopped because of how he had changed. I don’t dislike him, but I dislike his actions. You know what I’m saying? There’s a thin line between both of them. |

    His actions are partly due to sudden fame, but how did a smiley, caring teen turn into an overly-confident, almost narcissitc guy? Remember the hateful comments he got when he first started his career? Hurtful words like ‘gay’ and ‘fag’ were thrown at him on a daily basis. I didn’t understand why because he was just a nice kid who had a great, unique voice.

    Has anyone every thought that words like ‘gay’ and ‘fag’ played a part in causing him to put on this overly ‘masculine’ image? Can’t say for sure, but the point I’m trying to bring across is that making fun of people/ignoring nasty people with issues isn’t going to help them get better.

    I like how you mentioned that you personally believe that you should make friends with everyone regardless of the type of influence they have on you. That’s a great mindset to have and i hope you’ll continue to write articles that spread such messages.

    • Hi Meredith, thanks for your really long comment :’)

      Yeap. I don’t dislike him (JB) for his music, I dislike him for his actions. I guess everybody just jumped on the bandwagon of insulting him and all, and when he proved everyone wrong by becoming really famous and all, and hanging out with famous chaps and industry leaders, his ego rose spectacularly and that is why he needs a lot of help.

      And I agree with the rest of your points. Thank-you for enlightening us with more perspectives for everyone here :)

      Take care!

  3. Pingback: 5 Types of People You Should Totally Hang Out With To Be Happy | Lhu

  4. Pingback: Move over juice cleanse, it’s time for a social cleanse | Falling in love with Diego

  5. “It’s called “Justin Bieber”. I spit the whatever I was drinking at this line. Lol

    You do have a wicked sense of humor, and yea, we all need to let go of stuff every now and then. Thanks for sharing!

    • Haha thank you for making my day :) I really love it when people appreciates my style of humor and it’s nice knowing that they leave my blog feeling perked up! Take care!

  6. Straight Talking says

    I really like this blog and I’m new to all of this, just wondered what is the theme you use? I tried to look for it but wasn’t having much luck, I think this is a great example of a blog that is easy to read with a great theme.

    Keep up the great work!

  7. This was great! Funny but also peppered with truths. I especially liked this line ” They’re buzzkills, morale annihilators, mood destructors, vibe obliterators etc,…” I’ve encountered people like this in my life before and I’ve decided that like a tumour they must be cut from my life. I am seriously considering unfriending people who have not seen frozen ;)

    Great post!

    -Abby

    • Hey Abby thanks for your kind words. I am also seriously considering unfriending people who have seen too much of that movie.

  8. Worst news ever. I haven’t seen Frozen yet.

    This explains why people keep taking the long route when passing me on the street and why no one wants to have lunch with me at work.

    At least I now know the problem and can look to fix it posthaste.

  9. Fab, I still cannot believe you are only 16!

    P.S… I nominated you for a Liebster Award, here are the rules, and the link to my nomination…

    http://lauragabriellefeasey.wordpress.com/2014/04/23/the-liebster/

    These are the rules:
    The Liebster Award is awarded to bloggers with under 200 followers to try to promote their blog a little and also bring together a community of bloggers. The rules of the competition are as follows:
    The nominated user must provide a link bank to the person who nominated them.
    Provide 11 facts about yourself.
    Answer 11 questions set by the person who nominated you.
    Choose 11 more people and ask them 11 questions.

  10. I love the terms that you use to describe those people,and the images, too! This is the style of writing that I like. I’ll be coming back for more. :)

  11. Pingback: Zero to Hero Day 4: Hi Neighbors! | Shared Wanderlust

  12. thejameswhitman says

    Found your blog and thought I’d leave you a quick comment. I like the theme you’ve used and there’s nothing like regular writing to improve your writing style. I especially like your fantasy football posts (and Scott Pilgrim gifs are always good — even if he is a Mr Negative). Keep it up, and feel free to swing by my own blog (jameswhitman.co.uk).

  13. #3 I have a few friends that owe me a lot of thank yous, I don’t know but is their really people who find it hard to say thank you? Even if it doesn’t cost them a thing? #5 I have friends who I pissed by just my breathing, and my facebook post about my dining in an expensive restaurant (even if its a free treat). Good read, Lhu!

    • As unbelievable as it sounds, there are actually people who don’t know how to do just that, but there’s always people on the opposite end of the spectrum, which I’m sure will make your life really special. And regarding your point for #5, I assume they’re just jealous, or just really need to vent their frustrations about their life on people who are doing great. Ignore them haha.

      Anyway thanks for the share, helped a lot and I’ll be sure to return you the favor someday. Take care!

      • Yeah right. and I forgot to mention that they are ex-friends now. Although I still have them around on facebook. But they can longer have my favor, unless if it’s some sort of an emergency. I still have a lot of friends who thanks me for just being me, anyway. You’re just awesome with “they’re just jealous” hahaha. Of course, they are to be ignored. This is worth sharing, Lhu.

  14. Love #5 the best! haha. Life’s too short to spend it around those who drain us. I’ve chosen to let go of several friends in the past few years because I ended up feeling badly about myself after being around them. I’m still working on reversing the emotional damage caused by believing their negativity (I tend to really internalize). Great post with wise words of wisdom.

    • Hey Christin, that’s awesome to hear. It might seem a little hard to let go at first as ironic as it sounds, but I’m sure after awhile you’re beginning to feel more free and enjoying life a bit more as well. Thank-you for the kind comment.

  15. Meg says

    You have a wicked (in a good way) sense of humor. Love this. So glad to have found your writing!

    • Hey thanks so much for your compliment. I previous couldn’t put a word to describe by style of humor but yes, “wicked” is the perfect adjective. Thank-you for your support and I look forward to entertaining you further!

  16. Lol…. Have been to my school?! Cos all those characters surround my world and give me the feeling Martians might be a better company!! Especially the Ego McFlurry…..
    Anyhow, on the brighter side loved the post!!
    -purrfectgirl

    • Haha I’m pretty sure these kinds of people are all around us. Fortunately for me I didn’t really know many of them, so I can only imagine your pain. Anyway, glad you enjoyed the post. Cheers!

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