If you haven’t read the first instalment of this series, here it is: 5 Types Of People You Should Avoid To Be Happy.
Hmm, after reading about the five types of people you should avoid to be happy, I decided that it is only be logical to write an article about the opposite, that is five types of people you should hang around with in order to be happy.
As mentioned in the previous posts, good friends are really important to have, because they really help you in so many aspects of your life. As you will find out later, true friends are your biggest fans, your listening ears, and your guidance in life. Nice, caring, thoughtful, amusing and charming are some of the words used to describe me.
Also, as mentioned in the previous article, I really like three paragraph intros, and I tend to use exactly three paragraphs before I start introducing my lists proper.
And I suck at Maths.
1. I’m going to climb Mount Everest with a tank top and bermudas.
I’m sure everyone of us have a friend like this currently, or at least one point of your life. They are the risk-takers. They seem to have no grasp of logic at times, most of the times in fact. For me personally, I’m one of them. Sometimes the things I do are really brazen, but if I feel that the potential benefits or experiences is definitely going to outweigh the so-called risks, I’m going to go for it. I may end up hurt, beaten, or other sadistic verbs you can think, but what’s the point of life if you’re going to live your life how other people tells you to.
Risk-takers make good friends, although it’s frustrating that they never heed your warnings (coming from personal experience). They push you out of your comfort zones. They inspire you to do things that you never thought of doing before. They force you to challenge the status quo set by yourself. A relationship, be it as friends or lovers, will turn stale if there’s no friction from time to time. As weirdly as it sounds, friction build bonds and help people grow closer to each other. So, you’ll very likely find that the risk-takers are the ones that will stick by your side for a really long period of time in your life.
If you look at it from another perspective, you’ll have friends to accompany you to try out the things that you want. It can be rather annoying when you want to go and watch an NBA game for example and your friends go like, “What’s the point of that?”
Can’t blame them though. Most of us only watch NBA games to see who will be the newest member of the Kardashian family.
Jokes aside though, imagine how painful life will be if you do not have people around you to accompany you to places you always wanted to explore, foods you always wanted to try, and activities you always wanted to experience. You’ll end up restricting yourself to a lot of things and lose valuable opportunities to create plenty of wonderful memories.
Since risk-takers are up for anything, they tend to be more open and more accepting of people and their individual cultures. And as mentioned earlier they push you past your limits and seeing them in action and achieving things in life will inadvertently force you to reconsider the purpose of your life and inspire you to take bigger leaps of faith.
I know, I’m pretty cool.
2. Oh I’m so happy for you! (And I really mean it)
How many times have this happened to you? Something good happened to you, you’re over the moon, you share it with your friends, they say they’re so proud and happy for you, and two days later you heard that they’re taking sh*t about you.
This has happened so many times to me before. I’m really lucky though that I have a lot more friends who are genuinely happy for me when something goes my way.
Everyone needs someone like this in their life. As the saying goes,
Don’t hit a man when he’s down, and don’t f***ing kick the ladder when he’s up on it.
It’s not a very good feeling to have something finally going your way when all the friends you thought were true to you are busy playing a game of Stab The Genius. I consider myself as someone who is on the brink of being over-confident, so when I’m not doing well in life, criticisms and all wouldn’t really affect me. However, when I’m up there, doing exceptionally well (something I’m humbly familiar with /flips hair/) support becomes all the more vital because you can only either take baby steps up the ladder, or plummet all the way down back to square one. I can survive when I’m struggling, but I will need my friends more than ever when I’m so close to getting the success I always wanted.
So, if you know you have low self-esteem, get a few friends who are truly concerned about your happiness and success in life, and will be there both when you’re down, and when you’re making your dreams come true. Jabs and gibes are really not morale-boosting elements to help you further your success. If you do not have a few friends that can be happy for you, you’re bound to fail, or miss out on fulfilling your full potential.
You might end up being scared of success because you’re used to people kicking you off the perch, or try to avoid advancing yourself because you became fine-tuned to be influenced negatively by criticisms.
Friendship is a two way street. Admiration and jealousy are two vastly different things. Pick the people that will make you feel good about your accomplishments. Pick the people that will help you continue your great progress. Pick the people that views you as their role model and tells you to ignore your critics and haters.
Everybody needs a listening ear every once in a while. Your friends are important because they serve just that purpose. They side with you most of the times, even though you’re wrong to make you feel better. For me though, I will usually ask my friends to explain their point of views about the matter with as much logic as possible.
Yes that’s right, I’m not a female.
Coming back, I’m the type of person who overthinks alot, but with a painful tinge of irony, I always miss out on the main reasonings and logical explanations behind things that happen to me. Hence, I feel better when people offer me a perspective that either puts me in the wrong, which I really appreciate trust me, or a perspective that convinces me that the other parties are at fault, when I’m confiding in my friend regarding an argument or conflicts in general.
It’s really important to get things off your chest as often as you can, to make sure you keep your mental well-being as healthy as possible and to ensure you can get through the day without feeling like you’re watching some MTV reality show featuring a girl who is wailing loudly because daddy didn’t get her the correct car for her 16th birthday.
Like omg, a Lamborghini totally sucks.
If you’re like me, who tend to overthink and require people to set you back on track, then having a friend who listens is really a blessing, and it applies to everyone as a matter of fact. Not only that though, if your friends are not judgemental people who empathises and make the effort to put a smile on your face, you’re a really lucky person.
I know how it feels like to be at your lowest and you’re really afraid to talk to anyone because you know you’ll be disturbing them over your persistent issues, so having friends who are angels in disguise will really help a lot, because these are the people who are going to be there for you when everyone else disappears.
Mentors are really important to have in your life as they’re the one that’s going to guide you when you venture into the unknown.
Unlike your teachers and lecturers, mentors are your friends. They’ll be able to understand you better, communicate with you better, and guide you better. They express their opinions on the things you do in a nicer way than your parents, who can be pretty direct at times due to the generation gap.
On top of what their name suggests, they are usually the ones that present you with all sorts of opportunities to advance yourself. I’ve been able to progress this far in my life with all the wonderful experiences working with different people and projects because my mentors have taught me a lot and I gained so much from their expertise.
Besides that, mentors genuinely want you to succeed. In this modern day and age with the mind-numbing amount of competition out there, it’s very rare to find people who really want you to go all the way and don’t mind teaching you everything they know in order to help you reach and fulfil your potential. Hence, having a mentor is quite frankly, crucial, because without them, your undoubted talents will just be another piece of floating wood in the Pacific Ocean.
For the last part, I got fellow blogger and GUEST of honor Chris Golden to help me out with it.
(Oh by the way, I saw a Miley Cyrus CD duct-taped under my desk in school today. So, I took it.
You never know when you might need duct tape.)
5. Not a Transformer – as per Chris (@lyteforce)
Say no to Starscream (because you shouldn’t ever say “no” to Optimus)!
We’ve all had friends, acquaintances, neighbours and general riff-raff say one thing to us and something entirely different to the person they were just talking about. No different than Starscream to Megatron (or Galvatron if you’re so inclined), they’re just friends of convenience. They will often use their two-pronged tongue to sweet talk when it is to their advantage, and wait until your back is turned or you are at your weakest to strike.
If they talk about others, they talk about you.
I get it. It’s not easy to see a transformer from the get go – you could say they are robots in disguise. One minute they’re a fire engine or a police car. And who would ever doubt that a fire engine or police car could be up to no good? But next thing you know – BAM! – you’re running for your proverbial life as they unleash fury behind your back while you’re busy shouting “No, No, No, No, No” over and over again.
And sure, human nature plays against us. As much as we’re all cheering for the good guys, there’s a part of us that looks at the bad guy and says, “Wow. That guy/girl is cool.” We’re hard-wired for good, yet don’t mind the thrill of a little bad. And let me tell you, these transformers are bad.
So ditch the Starscreams in your life.
Instead, surround yourself with “non-transformers” (other than Optimus) like Spike or Daniel Witwicky. Sure they might be a little dull from time-to-time, but it is extremely unlikely they’ll be two-faced and talk smack about you behind your back. They tell it to you straight. They share the good news just as often as they share the bad news. They will save the world if they need to, but would rather just chill and support you instead.
They might also be, a) li’ll too cocky, b) arrogant, c) direct, d) possess inexplicable logic most of the time, or e) All of the above, but you know you can count on them to be loyal when you need them to. To make it easier, we’ve included an image of how these people usually look like to make finding them more easy for ya’ll:
Want to be a GUEST of honor and contribute to Lhu? Feel free to drop me an email at email@example.com.
I was reviewing this article when I realise just big of an ego I have. Boy am I awesome. So, I decided to get you guys more involved in my posts. Just answer the following question:
“What’s the nicest thing any of your friends have done for you before?”
… and you might walk away with a US$15 Starbucks gift card!
Don’t know what Starbucks is? How can yo – Oh, I made a typo… Starbucks is supposed to be spelled as “insanely overpriced coffee”.
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you are right.
This article really helped me a lot. Made my day as well.
My pleasure Smith :)
I’ve nominated you for the Liebster Award!! No, I didn’t, I did trip over your ego on the way in though. I just wanted to say that I like your blog. I know you’ll be nodding wisely at that.
Hey! I’m sorry I missed out on replying your comment. I’m honored to be nominated for the Liebster Award, but I reckon I’ll be doing it probably at the start of 2015. Thank-you for your support and I hope you’ve been enjoying my articles :)
Hey, I think your site might be having browser
compatibility issues. When I look at your website in Ie, it looks fine but when opening in Internet Explorer,
it has some overlapping. I just wanted to give you a quick heads up!
Other then that, excellent blog!
P.s that Connor Franta gif killed it ;)
Haha I’m surprised, considering that is the very first gif! glad you enjoyed it tho.
Great post buddy. Really enjoyed reading it. Would love to read some of more interesting stuff from you :)
Thank-you so much! Have you gave my latest post (Perks Of Having A Weird (Sur)Name) a read?
Enjoyed your post. Some humour but good advice thrown in together. Definitely pays to surround ourselves with good people. I am happy having quality not quantity when it comes to friends :)
Definitely. If only more people in the world would understand the significance of your last sentence.
That’s it. Friendship isn’t a competition :)
I remember reading your 5 types of people to avoid post when I decided to follow your blog. You have so much knowledge, You are an inspiration, I loved this post because it reminded me that there are good people out there. I have a friend that fits 2 of your types. She’s genuinely happy for me when I talk to her about positive things happening in my life and she’s also the friend that I can vent to and she’ll always be there for me no matter what.
I love your writing style, I can see so much of your personality shining through. I can tell that you are a great friend and an honest person. I’m very happy to have found your blog.
Wow your comment made my day haha! “An inspiration”… I’m honored. That’s nice to hear that you have a friend like her. Haha “great” and “honest” are gross understatements :)
So remember my comment on your 5 types of people you should avoid to be happy post?!…..I had said I have all of them in my school?! Well, I am not so fortunate to say the same in this post :( but atleast I got the ” I am gonna climb the Mount Everest…” friend!! I kinda felt like you were actually describing my friend!
It is a pity I got to land on this school of mine which gives me creeps always, but yet with the “Mount Everest ” friend, I feel life will always be creepy…on the brighter side, I teach my friend life is always crazy!!
Heh, ask your friend if he or she knows me /winks/. Life is supposed to be lived that way; fun, crazy, creepy. Glad you’re living an exciting life!
Yeah! Just called her up and asked her to read your post! Well she is 100x creeped out, but at the same time she is screaming that she gonna become popular through your post… Ugh… My friend.. I asked her to go catch some sleep…
You wanna know how my life is at the moment?!
A lit bit of horror ness filled with craziness and little toppings of creepiness and of course some embarrassment here and there accompanied by THE LOOKS OF OTHER HUMAN SOULS….
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Nice piece. Great use of media. Smart hook with the give away Starbucks. My best friend sat with me on the phone for 2 hours while I was suicidal, talking me down. Not talking at all – silence, she was there. I’m still here!
Wow, 2 hours. That is insanely loyal and sweet of your best friend. I hope everything is well with you now.
Wow. I love this post and I can really relate to this! I also had the same realizations last month and I’m really thankful to have friends who have those traits that were stated on this post. I also love your writing style and the fact that you’re only 16 years old amazes me. Keep it up and God bless! :)
Yeap, good friends can really make you wonder why your life is so wonderful haha. Maybe that’s just me. Thank-you for your kind words!
A great compliment to your other post, loved it. I especially loved 4 and 5. One of the nicest things a friend has done for me is to be there when I needed someone. I suffer from anxiety disorder and was really nervous about driving to the airport on my own. Even though it was early she told me to call her on my way so I had somebody to talk to and distract me on the drive (thank goodness for bluetooth!). It was a small gesture with a grand effect.
Hey, thank you for your kind words. That’s actually pretty nice. Not a lot of people will sacrifice their sleep in order to deal with problems of their friends. Thank god your friend was caring and understanding haha. I hope you’re better now though :)
Awesome post once again!
I appreciate that you took the “bad” list and created it’s opposite. Once again, you’ve got some great insight. So wise for such a young age. :) I think I’ve been the kind of friend you describe on both lists at various times in my life. As I get older, I’d like to think I’m becoming more like the descriptions on this one. But only my friends could tell for sure. ;) Great article!
My pleasure. And I know right I’m so wise! Haha on a serious note, everyone kinda grows into at least three of these five categories as they get older? All the harsh experiences people get, esp. in their 20s and 30s, kinda shape them up into being better people, and making them mature and more appreciative bout things around them as well. Also, as we grow older, we kinda know how to prioritise our time better, so instead of gossiping and stuff like that people will like not bat an eyelid bout this things and just do something productive y’know?
Thank you for taking the time out to comment :) Take care!
“…but it is extremely unlikely they’ll be two-faced and talk smack about you behind your back. They tell it to you straight.”
I don’t know but they are pretty scary when you’re just getting to know them. It takes a while to adjust to their way of talking sometimes, lol. Oh— this list is pretty accurate too. :)
That I have to agree :) Usually these type of people aren’t usually approachable not because they’re ice-cold but because they’re really enthu about things and life in general. As long as you resonate with them on the same pitch though, you’ve gotten yourself a really great friend :)
Thank-you for your kind words. Take care!
I’d never guess you were younger than me by the way you write-and good on you for it! I pretty much agree with your list up there, but it’s a pity because people come as a package deal with good and bad. I’m trying to think which I’d fit…I’m pretty crazy and spontaneous, and I am genuinely happy for my friends when something great happens to them. And those last couple of paragraphs are practically a description of me. I absolutely hate people talking about me behind my back and I don’t do it myself-girls have a really bad rep for gossiping; I hate that and never do it myself. I tell it straight up if I’m annoyed and give praise where due. That’s it. And Tony Stark is awesome-you have earned my complete approval just for that picture ;)
Haha glad to hear from you The Ace! Yea, I actually never thought of it that way, like a ‘package deal’ of good and bad. Nice way of putting it haha. I respect girls who don’t gossip, because trust me there’s so much peer pressure everywhere it’s like if you don’t gossip you’re not normal, and don’t deserve to be popular and liked that kind of superficial nonsense. Admire your courage and positive attitude Ace :)
Thank you for your kind words once again and taking the time to comment. Take care!
You’re welcome as ever- praise where due and comments where I have something to say.
Well that’s how it is-package deal! They say you can’t choose family but can choose friends, that’s true to an extent but in the end I doubt you or I will ever meet a person who doesn’t have at least one habit or trait that just gets on our nerves.
Like for me, I’m really open and I can talk about mosts things without getting offended but I hate it when people try to tell me how to act or correct how I do something( besides teachers at college, I’ll tolerate it then) and it’s just not their place to do that. They take liberties I haven’t allowed them, so I guess in that sense it takes a while for people to get close enough that I allow it. Ugh, it annoys me so much.
Trust me I know about the pressure- I went to a girls school for secondary and where I’m at now is majority boys. I much prefer it and actually I tend to get on with the guys more since I am really not a girly girl by any description. And about being normal, what even is that? I’m proud to be quirky and bold and ME. People around me found that hard to handle at first but they know that it’s not that I was trying to be like that, I just am. Yeah, I’m not sheep. Haha thanks for the high praise! Sorry to disappoint but positive isn’t really a word I’d use to describe myself. More often than not I’m cynical and sarcastic than positive. Life’s not always positive, right? And it’s silly to see everything like it is-naive really. Stuff happens that’s not great, and even if I wish I could make a cake with sunshine and rainbows and we could all eat it and be happy( Mean Girls anniversary today, I had to) it’s not going to get any better. All the same it’s not the end of the world. That’s my take on it.
Wow that turned out to be a long comment. Sorry?
It’s okay I like it when people share their stories with me :) Glad to know a part of your life.
What you said is true tho, we can’t be perfect. I think all of us have mixtures of some of the traits in this article and some of it in the previous one. What makes us good or bad friends ultimately depends on how many more ‘better’ traits we have.
Haha it’s okay you’re not alone. I hate it when people tell me what to do as well. But in the end it’s better to take the back seat sometimes as I get to learn a lot when I don’t resist nayum sayin?
As long as you remain true to yourself and be yourself, people will eventually give you the respect you deserve, knowing that you’re not a pushover or an easy person to influence. Love that show. But somehow I didn’t know the anniversary was yesterday. Ah well, “it’s not the end of the world”.
That’s true, it’s all about balance-sounds pretty deep right? But I think that’s really what it is.
Oh, I didn’t mean being told what to do in general- I can follow instructions and rules and things just fine. I don’t have a problem with authority or anything, I meant I don’t like when my friends try to tell me stuff that it’s not their place to tell me. At the beginning of this year one of my friends who I really get on with told me how she thought it’d be a good idea if I worked a lot harder than last year and didn’t talk and did the work quickly. That wasn’t her place and it annoyed the hell out of me- she didn’t know how I was doing this year at all. I know she might have meant well but still. That kind if stuff.
Yes, you need to stay true, but it’s a long and difficult road in most cases. It’s easier to be a pushover I think- I wouldn’t really know though, I never have been- but you can’t please everyone and in the end you’re not yourself.
Oh you disloyal fan :P It was all over twitter and Instagram and even here.
And just in case you didn’t see the other comment I left, I nominated you for the Liebster award. I don’t have the link but it’s my latest post so if you go to heropinionatedblog.worpress.com you should see the details :)
Like you said it’s not easy being yourself especially when the society has reached never-before-seen heights in the judgement department, but if you think about it becomes easier and easier to stand out from the crowd now. Those who are succeed may not have better skills and talents that your average joe, but the fact that he stays true to himself separates him from the rest and hence he gets respect from people as well. I think that’s how everyone should behave and try to do in this day and age. A lot of people are starting to become less genuine and genuine nowadays. Sigh.
Being a pushover is not easy at all trust me. You have to go against your will. Imagine your pain if you wanna go out with Sally but your friends told you to go out with Tammy instead. We’re not programmed to feel good when we’re acting against our wills. It gets worse at night, because you’re constantly thinking about your “what-ifs” and all. And being a pushover, you won’t get respect, which I’m pretty sure a lack of it from people will just make you miserable and questioning your purpose in life every morning when you wake up.
And yea haha I meant that hmm I didn’t realise the anniversary till I went on my social networking sites. Thank-you for the nominations tho. I’m planning on doing one massive one before I cross the 200 follower mark. Sort of like a closure thing before I move on y’know? :)
Thank-you for your constant support all along. Really means a lot to me.
Yes, I get where you’re coming from in saying that many people are becoming less genuine. but I think it’s also true that things that used to be rare are becoming much more common, so in that sense it’s harder to stand out from the crowd. But when you get to grips with the fact you’re unique and you are different(none of that nothing-special attitude) it is easy to find a niche or a way of your own. Like a USP, you know?
I can understand what you say about being a pushover-as I said, I never have been so I really didn’t know and hadn’t considered many of the things you mentioned, so thanks for giving me a new perspective on that! But I suppose I have seen the things that you’ve pointed out in other people around me. In fact, it’s precisely because I’ve done things that I didn’t want to do several time that I decided that, if I was going to endure things I didn’t like, they had to be for myself and not because of someone else directly or indirectly.
You’re very welcome for the nominations :) I’m guessing I wasn’t the first/only one who nominated you-how could that be, right? But sure, that sounds like a good idea so go for it! I do like your posts so I comment-there’s really no other reason. Let me be honest-if they were boring, I wouldn’t read or comment on them ;) Thing is, I also don’t want to be annoying or persistent, so I’m glad you don’t find it that way.
And weirdly, it’s like I see bits of myself in what you write and I think we’re somewhat similar, I guess? Oh, and could I ask you a favour-would you check out my other blog? The link is: http://heropinionatedblog.wordpress.com/ . I’m cringing as I write this, cause the whole advertising thing goes against my way of doing things but oh well.
Fun read and totally agree about the type of people one should have in their life. Look forward to more posts!
Thank you for your continued support jipsybird!
This is a greatly written blog post. I must agree with the types of people you put on the list. Especially the mentors who seemingly help guide you where you may not necessarily know where to go. They can often help to unlock doors where you may not be able to do so, or know how to. Thank you for sharing. Every little bit helps to make life a better place for us to learn how to be happy in.
*As for someone doing something nice for me: When I was in the hospital a few years ago, there was a book I was wanting to read, but never said anything about it and out of nowhere my friend came to visit me (the only friend who came to the hospital) and brought that exact book I had been wanting to read without her even knowing I wanted it. I was the nicest gesture and filled me with joy that she came to not only visit during her extremely busy life but was considerate and thoughtful to bring me something of worth, since I love to read*.
Haha thank-you! Your friend is really really nice, albeit a li’ll creepy if you think about how he or she managed to read your mind when you didn’t tell anyone about what you want. What books do you like to read?
Welcome! haha nah not creepy at all. I reached out to the Universe and it heard me and brought my request through her. It was super cool! That book was “The Alchemist” by Paul Coelho. Ever heard of it? You should check it out if you haven’t. I actually loved to read Self Help Books and Autobiographies. What’s your favorite book ever?
Haha my fav? Twilight. I’ve never felt so captivated by a book before.
You know I loved the Twilight book series. I don’t blame you for liking them. I did watch the movies, but I was more of a fan of the books than the movies :)
Excellent! I especially love numbers two and five. You did a great job writing this and providing funny examples for each one.
Hey, thank-you for your kind words :)
These are so funny! You have a really smooth and lovely way about you and the way you write. I’m not sure if I’m being conned or befriended. Haha. Take that as you will. Cheers.
You’re befriended! Take care!
If we could only look into the future and tell which friends are consistently one of the five types! I keep meeting people and think they are great, then…they tell me about the “real stuff” in thier life and I am like WTH??? Is everyone crazy and the normal ones just hide it better? I’m pretty sure we lack shame in our society now and everyone just lets thier freak flag fly!
Haha tbh tho even tho it’ll be awesome that we could look into the life to find out who are perfect to be your friends, life will effectively be ruined. Sometimes, we change into better beings because of a friend that isn’t a good friend in retrospect, or we learn new lessons and adapt better to people and our surroundings. Life is a li’ll boring if it’s too perfect for me haha. But i get what you mean tho. After all in this digital age, everyone is more concerned about portraying a perfect image/brand of themselves via indirect mediums like the Internet, Instagram, Facebook etc., so for those who are really reliant on those platforms, it’ll be surprising to find out just how different they are in person when they let their true selves show.
Thank you for taking the time to read and comment on my post :) Appreciate it!
You are right! I think of all the bad boyfriends I have had…They have helped make me a better person!
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